The word “new” is dangerous in grief literature. Many widows feel guilty for wanting anything new. But therapists who specialize in bereavement argue that “new” does not mean “better.” It means different . A new routine. A new way of drinking morning coffee without setting out two mugs. A new identity that no longer says “wife.”

– Let her tell her own story, in her own words, at her own pace. If she uses raw language, don’t edit it. If she shares anger, don’t shame it.